


House Husband

by Froghedge



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Bitchy Louis, Bottom Louis, Fluff, Just read and find out LOL, Kid Fic, M/M, Mpreg, Rich Harry, Rich Louis, Sassy Louis, Starbucks, lots of cussing, rich people
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-30
Updated: 2017-05-16
Packaged: 2018-10-13 01:43:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,321
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10503834
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Froghedge/pseuds/Froghedge
Summary: Louis is a sassy, bitchy, cocky, blunt, lovely, bookworm, Starbucks loving house husband.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I saw this post on tumblr where it showed different ways of Louis being a bitchy house husband and I kind of went with it. 
> 
> Hope it's okay...
> 
> Enjoy...xxx
> 
>  
> 
> If you want the link to the post here you go 
> 
>  
> 
> [Tumblr Post](https://smittenwithlouis.tumblr.com/post/158978147880/louistopsfuckers-i-can-not)

Husband;

Someone who has your back when you need it, but knows when to get the hell out of your way when he has to. 

\----

Mondays are the worst. Like seriously who the fuck thought that a week should start on a Monday? Mondays should forever not exist. Nobody has time for a Monday. Especially when it means that my Harry has to go back to work. 

The only good thing is that the kids are back to school because I swear I love them to death but holy fuck they are annoying sometimes. They ask too many whys and want to know every single detail about every single little thing. And they are so mean! I know honesty is the best policy but damn they could defend their daddy once in a while. 

So I guess Mondays aren't THAT bad. I get the day to spoil myself and maybe get something for my kids and Harry. 

\----

"Did you hear what Sharon just got done?" 

Gasping and putting and leaning in closer to my new friend Eleanor "No! Tell me! Come on!" 

Rolling her eyes "So she said she was going to some country in Mexico or something to get her eyes done. Well, we all assumed she couldn't afford Doctor DeRosa anymore. You remember that? 

"Yes yes just go on!"

Eleanor leaned in closer "Well it wasn't that. Are you ready for this? She went to wherever to get her EYE COLOR changed her fucking eye color!" 

"Shut up! They do that shit?" 

"Apparently so. But wait! Louis, I almost forgot there is more!" 

My eyes bugged out just waiting to hear what else there was to this story. "Come on it's almost our turn to order"

"Okay okay…So Sharon you know has always been jealous of you" 

I put my hands on my hips "Well duh" 

"Carol said that she showed your picture to the doctor and got the same exact color as yours!" 

I just looked at Eleanor smiling my beautiful smile. "I knew that bitch was obsessed with me. I mean who wouldn't be?" 

Before Eleanor could answer it was our turn to order. 

"Hello, what can I get you today?" 

"I want a Venti Iced Skinny Hazelnut Macchiato, Sugar-Free Syrup, Extra Shot, Light Ice, No Whip" 

Of course, Eleanor would want. She can never try new things.

"And for you sir?" 

I smiled my sweet smile "Nothing for me thanks" and walked to a seat waiting for Eleanor to get her drink. 

Two minutes later and she was finally seated. 

"Finally. That took so long. Why didn't you get anything, Lou?"

I looked up from my phone and before I could say anything a man came to our table. 

"I'm sorry to bother you, but you just look really cute and thought you deserved a drink. I'm not asking for anything in return. I just wanted to treat a cute guy like you to something sweet." 

Smiling at the man and taking the drink "Thank you, sir"

"It's really no problem" And with that, he walked away.

"What the hell was that?" 

I took a sip of the drink the man had bought "Eleanor, darling, I don't buy drinks. I get them bought for me."

And with that, I took another sip and we enjoyed our Starbucks lunch.

\----

Let's get one thing straight. 

I love my children. No matter how much they may annoy me. Carsyn and Chandler part of my top 3 people I would die for. 

I didn't spend 9 months being bloated and gassy and 12 hours in labor for nothing. I love them and would do anything for them.

Harry and I created them with our love (maybe with some weed and booze but they don't need to know that). 

And that is why I have agreed to always be the one to pick them up from school. 

Waiting outside texting some dirty things to Harry I feel a figure come next to me. 

"Louis! Oh my gosh! It's been so long! How have you been?"

I looked up at Susan and sighed "Oh you know the same. Doing a little of this and that. How about you?" 

To be quite honest. I could not give two shits of what this woman said to me. She was the fakest of the fakes and has always been after my man. Not only that, but her kids have always picked on my babies!

I didn't realize she stopped talking until I saw her smiling her fake ass smile and pretty much staring into my soul. 

I was going to reply when my little girl came to the rescue. 

"Daddy! Daddy! I learned so much today and I got a gold star because I knew all my spelling words!" 

I picked up my little Carsyn and gave her a kiss on the cheek "That's so good baby girl! I told you all that practice with Papa was going to be worth it." 

"Papa always says you are right" 

I gave her another kiss and looked to see if Chandler was on his way out. 

"Oh, Louis she just gets cuter and cuter. Say before you go I was wondering if-"

Before she could finish I saw that Chandler was close so I grabbed his arm "I would love to stay and chat about your cheating husband and terrible nose job, but I have pilates." 

And with that, I was out of there.  
\----  
Liam is my SBF. 

Straight Best Friend. 

We go waaaaay back and he's always been by my side. Even kissed me a couple times to help me keep some guys away at clubs. 

Maybe he wasn't that straight. But nonetheless he is my SBF and as my SBF he has agreed to take pilates with me. 

And by taking pilates I mean sitting on the floor and pretending to be doing whatever the hell pilates is. 

I mean the only reason I signed up was for the free headband.

I was going to cancel it, but Harry was going on and on about how we would be paying more to cancel and how reckless and some other shit. Honestly, he was balls deep in me and I just agreed to keep the membership so that he would get me to cum. 

I made Liam sign up with me and had to bribe him with a promise that he would come with us to see Toy Story on Ice.

"I can't believe you said that to Susan" 

I stretched my legs out and looked over at him "I had to get out of there somehow and besides I did have to come to pilates so it wasn't a complete lie" 

He smacked my arm "Not that you idiot! I can't believe you mentioned her nose job and cheating husband! Don't you think that was a bit harsh?" 

I tilted my head and rubbed my chin thinking "Not when her kid keeps bullying my babies" 

Liam took off his shoes and laid on his back "I forgot about that. They still haven't handled it?" 

I took off my shoes and laid down next time "Me and Harry are going to talk to the school again and if they still don't do anything then Harry said he will sue the school or something" 

"I could always kick the dad's ass" 

I turned my head towards Liam and smiled "Or you could always have him eat your ass and blackmail him" 

Liam turned his head facing me with his eyes bugged out "Why the hell would I want my ass eaten? You know I never know why you like it so much. And why aren't you wearing socks!" 

I just laughed and sat up a little putting one hand on his chest "Liam, I'm telling you, eating ass is a delicacy and I'm glad my man used to be a baker, he does it just right"  
\----

Tuesdays were a lot better than Mondays. Only because it was book club day and reading is my favorite. No matter what book it is I always seem to love it.

I know it's crazy. Me of all people love to read, but it's true. Harry built a nice big library in our home and it's one of my favorite places to be. I get lost in the different characters and worlds. I love using my brain for good and putting the words into images. 

It's also the place my babies were made. 

Oops. 

Today's book club was meeting at Kate's house. She has the most comfortable couches ever. They are made of clouds. 

The club consists of Kate, Susan, Dan, Ryan, Carol, Zoe, Sharon, Eleanor, Tracy, Josh, and Sue. 

Carol is always first to speak "I am hoping everyone is ready to discuss Gone Girl and if you haven't finished reading it then shame on you." 

She sat down and the discussion began. 

Dan was up "I found it confusing and didn't really understand who the crazy one was" 

Tracy "I agree both Nick and Amy have some psychological problems they need to solve. However, Amy was definitely the crazier out of the two" 

Josh "The first half was really good but towards the end, it got bland and boring"

Sue "The movie was better" 

Let me just say that I never liked Sue. "How can you say something like? They left out so many things!" 

Sue just flipped her hair "Movies are always better than the books. I mean have you seen the Harry Potter movies?" 

Fuck this bitch "They completely cut Dumbledore's funeral! How could you say that wasn't important! Or the fact that the tale of Merope Haunt and Tom Riddle sr. is complex, moving, and totally important for explaining why Voldemort is such a dick and the fact that it helps explain Gaunt's ring - a Horcrux and therefore a legitimately important plot that they completely cut the fuck out! 

I took a deep breath and looked around the room "I am going to have to cut this short as I have some errands to run" 

I grabbed my things and walked out fuming and the only thing that gets me calm down is shopping. 

~ 2 hours later ~ 

I was finally calm and putting everything into my big pink range rover when my phone rang. 

I quickly grabbed it out and smiled seeing my Harry on the screen. 

"Hello, love! I was just on my way-"

"Louis! How many fucking times do I have to tell you that you can't go around doing all this fucking useless shopping! We have two kids to out through college plus the fucking car bills and having to pay the fucking maids and buy fucking food and-" 

I sat in my car and leaned my head on the steering wheel "I'm sorry I maxed out the credit card again, honey. Sue from book club, got me riled up again and I needed retail therapy"

I was a softy for my Harry. 

I heard him sigh "Baby I always told you that my money is your money and you can buy what you want but we have to be smart and not buy 30 candles."

"But they smelled good and looked so pretty!" 

He sighed again and I knew he wasn't angry anymore "Okay Louis just go home and we can talk later. I love you and can't wait to see you" 

I smiled and blew a kiss through the phone "I love you too! and I have so much to tell you! I can't wait" 

With that, we hung up.

And when Harry got home he listened to me talking about that dumbass Sue and of course he agreed that the books are better. 

Then we went into the library and fucked. 

\----

Wednesdays were for appointments.

And they aren't just boring old doctors’ appointments. 

The first appointment of the day is my nail appointment because I need this nails cleaned and ready to cut a bitch. And Harry loves it when my nails are kind of long. 

Danny, the nail guy, is my favorite. He knows just what to do and always gives the best massages. This time around I just went with a clear polish.

The second appointment of the day was my hit appointment. I got lucky with this salon because it's only a 2-minute walk from the nail salon. 

Zayn, the hair guy, is a master. He does things to my hair that I just can't explain. He adds the perfect amount of highlight and fluffiness. I think he ha a bit of a crush on me because he doesn't charge as much. And trust me I've done my investigation. But nonetheless, I have fluffy, highlighted caramel hair. 

The third appointment of the day is my facial. I don't just wake up with perfect skin. It's a process. Even if Harry disagrees.

My last appointment of the day is my waxing. I hate the hair and I am way to lazy to shave so I have invested in some good waxing. Harry has tried waxing before but we just ended up at the hospital. 

Again Oops. 

My facial ran a little long which meant I was running late.

Now I wouldn't say I have road rage, however, my dear husband may disagree. 

I just simply think people are stupid as hell when out on the road. Like is it that hard to let someone know you want to cut in front of them? or is that hard to do the proper hand gesture when you let someone through? 

It's them not me. 

I had my windows down and waiting at a stop light when I realized I should probably let my girl Gale know what's going on. "Hi, Gale, you're on speaker. I may be late to my anal waxing appointment, the poor are blocking the streets again"

I looked out the window and saw people staring. Oh well. It always feels nice to be hair free there. They should try it sometime. 

Gale just laughed "Oh it's okay dear, take your time. I've got all day for you"

I finally started moving again "Thanks, love. I'll be there soon"

It was the best feeling ever when Harry ate my ass that night. 

In your face poor slow people

\----

 

Thursday's are my favorite. It's just a random day and it seems that nothing bad ever happens on a Thursday. 

I am out with my good friend Niall today. He always has the latest scoop on everything. 

"Sue finally got her husband with someone" 

I was more shocked she hadn't before "I mean she has always suspected, it's about damn time she got proof so that she could shut up" 

"Oh that isn't the best part" 

I saw the way he was smiling and this only means one thing. Scandalous. 

"Spite it out. Come on" 

Niall intertwined his hands and sat back "She caught him with his face tongue deep in some guy's ass." 

I just couldn't help myself and started laughing uncontrollably. I wish I was there to have seen the look on the bitch's face. 

A couple minutes and I was calm again "Do you know the bloke's name? I have to send him a gift basket"

Niall took a sip of his drink "I'm still in the process of finding out who it was. All I know is that he is fit and has brown hair" 

Sighing and sitting back in my chair "That could be anyone. Keep digging! What else is new?" 

"Well I'm sure you heard about Sharon and her new look, but did you hear about what else she is getting done?" 

"What else can she possibly get done! She won't be able to move her face with all that plastic" 

"She is getting her knees done" 

I just rolled my eyes "The fuck is she doing that for?" 

Niall smiled and took another sip "She wants to be shorter"

It took me a minute before it clicked "That bitch wants to turn into me!" 

"Ding ding ding we have a winner" 

I couldn't help but laugh again "I can't believe how obsessed she is! Does she not know there can only be one Louis and that Louis is already fucking amazing" 

Niall squeezed my shoulder "You are one of a kind, Lou. But this also means she won't be able to watch the kids today and you have to be the daycare today"

I just looked at Niall like he was crazy, which he is "Daycare? You want me to look after other people's brats all day? I can hardly stand my own" 

"Oh come on it won't be that bad" 

I pushed Niall away "This was nice and all but I have to go and get my toes waxed" 

Later that day I had 6 brats running around my home. 

Fuck Niall for calling Harry. 

Fuck Harry for persuading me. 

Fuck me for being a slut for Harry's dick. 

And fuck this brat who keeps picking his nose. 

\----

Fridays are when I prepare myself for the weekend. This weekend there is going to be a party. What the party is about who knows. The only thing that matters is what you are wearing.

As per usual I was driving and seemed as though everyone needed to be driving today. 

What is worse is that the plaza I need to get to is having some sort of sale. Meaning the parking lot is going to be packed. 

Pulling in I had to drive around 6 times before I finally found a decent parking spot.

The only thing was a lady with a blue mini-van was waiting, however, with my excellent driving skills, I got there first. 

Oops. 

The lady honked her horn and was cursing or something. 

I got out of my car and saw that she had rolled down her window "Sweetheart, this is the parking for Gucci. Come back when you can afford jeans that aren't from the dollar store"

And with that, I was off.

\----

Saturday mornings are my favorite. Harry and I get a chance to sleep in and snuggle for a lot longer. And god bless my babies they actually sleep in late meaning I get my alone time with Harry. 

I felt a kiss in my hair and an arm get tighter around me “Good morning love”

I smiled and hid my face into Harry’s chest “morning”

“Are you excited for the party today?”

I groaned “Ugh don’t remind me. I have so much prepping to do”

Harry laughed and kissed my hair again “Don’t be so dramatic. You could go looking like this and you would still be the best-looking person there”

I finally looked up at him “So you want me to walk into the party with only my yellow panties and my sheer nightshirt”

“As long as I am at your side 24/7”

I giggled and smacked his chest “You just love to show me off”

He smiled that million dollar dimpled smile “You are just too party not to. Besides you love the attention”

I gave him a little peck “Well right now I just need your attention because they panties are getting really tight”

Harry groaned “Fuck Lou”

I started kissing down his neck “If you hurry up you could be fucking Lou”

And that is why Saturday mornings are the best.

Saturday afternoons are a different story. Especially, this one. 

Usually it would be spent hanging with the kids, however, I need to really prep myself for this party. 

It’s not like I don’t know I look good. Because I know I do. Even if I have a short amount time to get ready I still pull it off. Call me cocky. I’ve been called worse. It’s just that everyone at these parties always goes all out and look A1. They always try and top the last party.

This is no exception. 

After a nice breakfast with my loves I told Harry he has to keep the kids occupied or he won’t be seeing a happy husband for a very long time. 

Of course, he agreed. 

~ Party Time ~ 

When Harry and I walked into the party all eyes were on us as they should be. I mean come on we are HarryandLouis. Best looking people here. 

After that, we separated and he went to talk business with his people and I went to talk fashion with my people. 

Of course, we will probably meet up later in the bathroom to fuck. Harry is looking quite nice in his tight suit. 

“Can you believe the new nose on Pam?”

“Who in the world gets a bigger nose?”

I took a sip of my strawberry daiquiri “Her husband has a nose fetish”

Everyone around me gasped. 

“I always knew Stan was a weird one”

“What is so appealing about a nose”

I snickered because has Danielle seen her nose? I decided to tune them out and looked around the place. It was nice and pretty simple. Everyone was defiantly dressed to the T. 

That is when I spotted Her. 

“Who invited Kate? This is a party for rich, hot socialites. For God’s sake, she’s shown up in last season’s Prada”

And with that everyone turned their heads towards her as she made her way over. 

Now let me tell you. I don’t hate anyone. I am a very friendly persona and will talk to you until you fuck me over.  
Kate was the exception. She was a flat out bitch from the start. I didn’t say two words to her and she started throwing insults at me. She acted like she was the Queen. Well, honey, I sure as hell proved her wrong.

“Hello, Lewis.”

I just rolled my eyes, took a sip of my drink and went to find my husband. 

I needed a good fuck. 

\----

On Sunday I woke up with a slight headache and cum all over me. 

Last night was a good night after I found Harry and now today we enjoy a family day. 

Harry decided today would be a good day to teach the kids how to ride a bike. I thought it would be a good day to stay inside and watch movies. We compromised and now my two angels can zoom around. I felt so proud and giddy. Whenever they learn something new I look at Harry and think “Best fucking decision of my life” 

Harry looked over at me with a confused look “Why are you staring at me like that?”

I guess I had my creepy adoration smile on “I just love you and am so happy with life”

He grabbed my hand and kissed it “I love you too Louis even if you are a bitchy house husband”

And with that, I jumped on him and kissed the fuck out of him. 

The kids can be quiet with their annoying “Ew Daddy”


	2. Louis' Day

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So since yesterday was Mother's day I thought what would Louis in this story be like on that day and I kind of went with it. 
> 
> Just an FYI and something to keep in mind is that this is meant to be funny or at least somewhat funny. 
> 
> Anyways....
> 
> Let me know what you think!
> 
> Enjoy..xxx

"Shut up Chandler you are going to wake daddy"

"You are the one being loud Carsyn"

"Am not!"

"Are too!"

"Am not!"

I groaned and lifted my head to glare at my offspring who were going back and forth and back and forth when finally I had enough "Enough!"

They both stopped and looked at me then jumped on the bed screaming "Happy mother's day!" I have to admit they are pretty damn cute even when they are annoyingly loud.

I give them each a kiss on the cheek and cuddle them "Why thank you my little offspring but you know how I like this day right?"

They looked at each other then at me then back at each other then me and for christ sake where the hell did they get this habit from! Chandler finally spoke up "I know but papa told us to come in and wake you because he wants to talk to you"

I groan and maneuver my way out of bed and from the little green eyed alarm clocks. "I cannot believe he is making me get out of bed just to talk. Does he not know I like my sleep?" I go over to a corner chair and put on my silk robe "You know kids take it from me sleep is the most important thing and if you sleep until the afternoon just say oh well and go on with your day"

Carsyn looked at me bug-eyed "But Papa said we can't waste our day sleeping or else all the cookies and ice cream will disappear and never come back"

I chuckled and put on my slippers before picking up her up "Don't worry baby girl Papa and I will always give you ice cream and cookies"

She clung on to me and all three of us went downstairs. "You rang big papa"

Harry turned his head and looked at me with that stupid dimpled smile. Ugh, this man kills me. "Yes I did now have a seat, my queen"

He gestured towards the dining table where there was pancakes, eggs, bacon, sausage, toast, bagels, all kinds of jam and cream cheese. I set Carsyn in her seat and go to my seat that is a giant silver thorn because duh I'm the queen.

 

 

Harry comes and takes a seat across from while Carsyn is to the left and Chandler to the right. "Now my dear husband why the hell do you have me up at this ungodly hour"

Harry looks at me and just smiles "Well my queen I was thinking that after you have your day to yourself you would want to join me and the kids at my parents"

I just stared at him while he and the kids stared at me "Now why in the world would I do that?"

"Please, baby please It would mean a lot to me and the kids. I know you guys never really go along but please!"

I crossed my arms and sat back in my throne "No"

Harry got up, turned my throne around and kneeled in front of me "I know you two don't like each other and always make bitchy comments towards one another but I just want you two to spend just an hour together with us"

I just glared "No"

He unfolded my arms and held my hands "I'll let you have an unlimited credit card that way when Sue from book club gets you heated I won't get mad"

"Deal" and sealed it with a kiss.

"You know since today's mother's day should we start calling you mommy instead of daddy since papa is the one that celebrates father's day and you celebrate mother's day"

"Nobody asked you Chandler and eat your pancakes"

I look over at Carsyn with a smile because that's my baby girl.

\----

After breakfast and after the kids leave I can finally enjoy my day. I know being a mother you are supposed to spend time with your kids because you know the only reason you are one is because of you birthed some kids. But my baby daddy and I agreed that I get this day to do nothing but relax because I work hard 364 days of the year and this one day is mine.

I decided to call up my bestie Eleanor mainly for her to bring me some Starbucks because I haven’t had my fix today “Hello El! How are you doing this fine morning?” 

I could hear her eyes rolls way back “I am almost at your place with your venti caramel macchiato with 3 shots of espresso. You don’t have to ask how my morning is going”

I gasped and put my hand to my chest “How dare you! I do sometimes care how your morning is going”

“Yeah okay Louis just open your damn door” 

I hung up and walked over to the front door and when I opened it I was met with an annoyed Eleanor. “Why you look delightful on this fine day” 

“Yeah yeah can you just move your big bum so I can go shit” 

I scrunched up my nose because ew “Can you not stink up the bathroom this time. Harry actually thought I had taken a dump. I mean does he not now that I don’t take dumps?” 

Eleanor just ignored me and ran to the bathroom while I took a sip of my Starbucks. 

~1 Hour Later~

“Jesus Christ El what took so long? Did you have Mexican or something?” 

She came and sat next to me on the couch and put her abnormally long legs up “I’m not used to all the spices and you know it messes me up so leave me alone you ass”

“Excuse me but I prefer the term bitch”

Eleanor just rolled her eyes and we got down to business “Okay so Sue told Karen who told Ashley who told Sam who texted Niall who DMd me that Susan has been at it again saying you got butt implants”

I rolled my eyes and took a sip of my drink “No this bullshit again! Does she want to come feel up my ass because I don’t mind proving her jealous ass wrong”

Eleanor took a sip of her drink and nods “I think she is scared her husband is going to cheat on her again and this time with you”

I leaned back on the couch and threw my head back laughing “I’m used to the Susan’s of the world talking shit. Most women hate me, but their husbands certainly do not”

Eleanor just rolled her eyes again “Of course they do not Loui, you are the queen of the town”

I stand up and flip my hair “You are damn right I am and today I am the ONLY queen around here”

Eleanor pulled me back down to the couch “Okay Queen what are we doing today?”

I smiled at her “We are getting waxed today”

She groans and rolls her eyes, again “Please don’t tell me it’s-“

Before she could finish “We have an anal appointment with Gale in 30 minutes”

“Good lord”

\----

“I cannot believe I just witnessed you getting your anal waxed”

I put my arm underneath El’s and continued walking “Well Liam has been with me a bunch of times now it is your turn and besides it’s mother’s day and I am a mother which means you do as I say”

“Bitch you are not my mother which I should probably call mine before she loses her shit again”

I walk over to a bench and sit while Eleanor calls her beloved mother. “Hurry up I want to go shopping with my new credit card”

"Oh, my goodness is that you Louis?"

I look to my left and see the one person I did not want to see today “Hello Susan, lovely running into you at this place”

She took a seat next to me “Well I was just on my way to get a facial when I spotted you from a mile away. I mean you are very hard not to miss”

I smiled and flipped my hair “Well I am a queen”

She gave me the fakest of the fake smiles there is “Yes well why aren’t you with Harold and the kids? It is mother’s day”

I was getting annoyed and was trying not to lose my shit on this woman "First of all his name is Harry and secondly, I know it's mother's day I am just trying to look my best for tonight when my husband takes me to bed and eats my ass out for hours on end"

She gasps “That’s absolutely disgusting! How can you say such vulgar things!”

I shrugged my shoulders “Don’t knock it till’ you try it”

And with that, she got up and walked away.

“Was that Susan?”

I looked over at Eleanor and smiled “We had a lovely conversation and now time to shop!”

Eleanor just shrugged and we were off.

\----

“Louis I’m tired and you are going to be late getting to your in-laws”

I glared at her and kept looking at my choices “A queen is never late. Everyone else is simply early” 

“Okay queen could we just go because I maxed out my card already and this isn’t fun anymore”

I sighed and looked at El “Okay we can go only because I want Harry to eat my ass tonight and that won’t happen if I max out another card”

And with that, we left and arrived back at my place where we saw Liam sitting on the porch.

"Hello, Lima!"

“I told you to stop calling me that Louis”

“Pish posh. Now what do I owe the pleasure of seeing you here”

Liam got up and handed me a medium sized box “Happy Mother’s day”

I smiled and started opening up the box “Aw Lima you shouldn’t have”

 

“You told me if I didn’t get you anything you would tell everyone I like getting my anal waxed and that I do pilates instead of lift weights”

Eleanor just started laughing beside me while I took out my gift “Nothing wrong with that dear and oh my this is just wonderful thank you my SBF”

I took the crown out of the box and placed on my head “How do I look peasants”

Eleanor and Liam both smiled “You look like a true queen Louis”

I took out my phone and took a selfie for Harry. I may or may not be wearing this to bed tonight.

“Well now that you have your present I have things to do”

Eleanor just smirked and mumbled “Like getting that hairy ass waxed”

I busted out laughing and Liam just walked out huffing. 

Oh well.

Eleanor wished my good luck tonight and said she had to go visit some people and now I was left on my own. I decided to actually get ready making sure that I looked extra pretty tonight. As I was getting ready I was thinking about my kids and how much I actually missed them today. They made me cute handmade cards and homemade Rice Krispy treats that said "Best Mommy Ever" which okay I don't like being called mommy but I love my kids and whatever they make means a lot. I also thought about the day that I actually became a mommy and how I actually broke Harry's hand because I was squeezing too tight and he cried and whined about it for weeks. Well, he wasn't the one pushing out two things out of his ass so a little broken hand was nothing.

It was finally time for me to go meet up with my family and in-laws. Ugh, my mother-in-law is a real monster. She thinks she is the queen and makes too many blunt rude remarks about thinks. Like okay Anne no one cares that you get a brazilin wax or that you know about all the cheating husbands and wives.   
I made it to the house and when I walked in I was attacked by two cute little brats “Daddy Daddy you are actually here!”

“Of course I’m here Carsyn! I promised Papa I would be”

She kissed my cheek and smiled “Grandma said you wouldn’t be here and bet Grandpa lots of money”

I rolled my eyes and started walking to the living room “Hello everyone!”

They all turned towards with different expressions. 

Harry was smiling. 

Robin was gleaming. 

And Anne was distraught. 

Harry came over to me and gave me a kiss “Louis! You look beautiful! I see Liam stopped by with his gift” 

“Yes and I know you picked it out so thank you, babe"

I walked over to the couch and sat down in front of Anne.

“Hello Anne”

Anne finally broke out of distraught state and spoke “Well played Tomlinson well played”

I smiled and corrected her “It’s Styles sweetie and Happy Mother’s day. I must say thank you for becoming a mother because without you being a mother I wouldn’t have my Harry”

She just rolled her eyes and got up for another drink “Nice crown”

“It fits me just right, right Harry?”

Harry just gives me a quick nod and takes a sip of his drink.

Robin finally spoke “It’s nice of you to show up Louis and Happy Mother’s day to you”

“Why thank you dear Robin and congratulations on winning big”

I heard Anne choke a little on her drink and Robin awkwardly spoke up "Uh thanks…so how was your day?”

I clapped my hands together and sat up straighter “Oh my god! It was the best day ever! I woke up to a beautiful breakfast made by Harry and my little monsters then Eleanor stopped by and took an hour long shit then we went to get anal waxed then we spent a shit load of money at Adidas and Gucci and Victoria Secret to get a little something sexy for my man tonight”

Robin and Anne looked at me with wide eyes while Harry just kept drinking his drink.

Robin cleared his throat and spoke “Well that sounds like a lovely day”

I looked over at Harry and smiled “However, nothing beats getting to see my man and kids”

Harry smiled and pulled me closer to him so he could whisper in my ear “I love you”

I giggled and whispered back “How much longer do we have to stay?”

He gave me a kiss on the cheek “Just a couple more minutes then we can go back home and I can make sure they waxed you correctly”  
I giggled again and blushed “I can’t wait”

Carsyn and Chandler came in the living room after playing in the play room.

“Carsyn called me a peasant and said I have to buy her Starbucks because she doesn’t buy them they are bought for her”

Everyone looked at me. 

“Oops”


End file.
